It’s quite fitting that my last post was called the end. I haven’t written anything in weeks. I haven’t worked much either. Nor have I been dreaming up new blog posts. Not one. Until now.
In fact, I’ll be honest with you. I broke. I was pushing myself too hard and I snapped. It was inevitable really. I should have seen the signs. I was stressed out, emotional, quick to anger. I challenge any one to keep up the pace I was going.
I’m still not better. But I am slowly fixing myself. I’ve had to let some things go. For now, I’m concentrating on my upcoming wedding, and one editing job that I’m really enjoying. And my girls, of course, with help from family.
I always thought I lived in the moment. And I was happy in the moment. But I’ve come to realise I have a terrible habit of wishing my life away for when I’m a famous writer, when we’ve paid off our debts, when the girls are at school, when the house is finished so we can move, when I’ve finished my book…..
There is nothing that will bring you back to the present moment than a threat of illness, a threat of losing everything, a threat of break down.
But at least it has stopped me in my tracks. I know I need to be grateful for everything I have RIGHT NOW. And I’m working on it.
Writing will help. When I’m ready.